"What the hands learn, the mind cannot forget"
​The Official Dad Joke Page
This is my stepladder . . .
I never knew my real ladder . . . 
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How do billboards talk?
​.....Sign Language.
What does a dinosaur use to pay his bills?
.....Tyrannosaurus Checks.
Why are shoes that have a job so grateful to the sidewalk?
.....It keeps them off the streets.
I hurt my foot driving Big Sally over here today.  Do you know who I called?
.....The toe truck.

When does a sandwich cook?
.....When it's bakin' lettuce and tomato.
Old sailors never die . . .
. . . they just get a little dinghy.
                                              Pat Hardage's
                      PineWoodDerbyWorkshop on the Bus
What's brown and looks like a stick?
.....a stick . . . 
How do you know you have quantum ducks?
.....   Quark!  Quark!

What does the symbol AH mean on the Periodic Table?
. . . . . It's the element of surprise.

Guy walks into Schroedinger's Veterinary Clinic.  The vet says, "About your cat . . . I have some good news, and I have some bad news . . ."

A photon checksinto a hotel.
The clerk asks, "Do you have any baggage?"
. . . "No," replies the photon; "I'm traveling light."

The element argon walks into a bar.
Surly barkeeper barks, "We don't serve your kind in here."
. . . Argon doesn't react.